Where Do They Get These Ideas?

Where Do They Get These Ideas?

Dang Me If Its Not From Richard Perle!

 

Values Australia provides the following information to help Australians understand some of their Australian values, especially to understand where our values come from in relation to Middle East policy (yes, we know they come from America, but where did they get them from?)

In 1996 a group calling themselves the Study Group on a New Israeli Strategy Toward 2000, and led by Richard Perle (well known for his work for the Likud at the Project for the New American Century), produced a paper for Benjamin Netanyahu, the then-Prime Minister of Israel.

Perle, a former Assistant Secretary of Defense, and known as “The Prince of Darkness” was also at the time an advisor to the Administration on Defense matters and remains a director of the Jerusalem Post. Amongst many other things.

David Wurmser is the Middle East Adviser to US Vice President Dick Cheney.

Douglas Feith was George W Bush’s Under Secretary of Defense for Policy. He was one of the signatories of the 1998 letter to President Clinton advocating the removal of Saddam Hussein. Feith led the controversial Office of Special Plans at the Pentagon which was set up to second-guess the CIA and other intelligence agencies and, some say, preemptively conclude that Iraq had WMD and “stove-pipe” this conclusion to the White House..

Other contributors were James Colbert, Charles Fairbanks, Jr., Robert Loewenberg and Meyrav Wurmser.

The paper was called “A Clean Break: A New Strategy for Securing the Realm“.

Amongst its conclusions:

“Israel has the opportunity to make a clean break; it can forge a peace process and strategy based on an entirely new intellectual foundation, one that restores strategic initiative and provides the nation the room to engage every possible energy on rebuilding Zionism

[…]

“Syria challenges Israel on Lebanese soil. An effective approach, and one with which American can sympathize, would be if Israel seized the strategic initiative along its northern borders by engaging Hizballah, Syria, and Iran, as the principal agents of aggression in Lebanon”

[…]

“Israel can shape its strategic environment, in cooperation with Turkey and Jordan, by weakening, containing, and even rolling back Syria. This effort can focus on removing Saddam Hussein from power in Iraq – an important Israeli strategic objective in its own right – as a means of foiling Syria’s regional ambitions.”

[…]

“Israel’s new agenda can signal a clean break by abandoning a policy which assumed exhaustion and allowed strategic retreat by reestablishing the principle of preemption, rather than retaliation alone and by ceasing to absorb blows to the nation without response.”

[All emphasis added]

Anything ring a bell?

Oh Pastor Ted, What a Jock You Are!

Oh Pastor Ted, What a Jock You Are!

There’s a Lotta Love in This Place

 

US House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s little girl, Alexandra Pelosi, has made a doco, Friends of God, starring Crystal Methodist, Pastor Ted Haggard, about evangelical christians. And quite an eye-opener it is.

And quite disturbing.

We assume that Pastor Ted will one day release the companion film, Friends of Dorothy.

It’s ironic that the doco was shot when Ted Haggard was still pretending to be straight, before he was outed by a gay ex-prostitute and resigned in disgrace, and before he converted back to Super-Heterodom by the grace of god in a world-record three weeks.

It’s disturbing because Pastor Ted involves his two evangelical friends in some jockstrapping competitive locker-room “dick-measuring” which shamelessly implicates their absent, compromised, objectivised wives. (They did not discuss the advantages of Crystal Meth.)

Values Australia, in any case, was intrigued by the purported heightened libido of those whom the ghostly fire has touched. We had assumed that most evangelical bedroom gymnastics would be confined to the missionary position. So we went in search of the alleged polling. After all, Ted says, “ALL the polls say…” We didn’t find one such poll.

But we did find some interesting material. Like this suggested bisexual threesome:

“Learn How To Please God and Your Wife From A Chirstian [sic] View Point!” shrieks sexually-skilled husband.com (now for sale).

“Discover How Christian Married Couples Have Exciting Sex“ offers christian-sex.net (no longer active)

We liked:

“Steamy Christian Sex: Have Passionate Sex In Marriage – Techniques and Advice That Work!” promised by SteamyChristianSex.com (defunct)

We checked out:

Jamaica Gleaner News – Porn in the pews – Churchmen wrestle with …
…Male church members surfing for sexy pics, survey reveals one-in-five churchmen …

“Churchmen wrestle with” …what? Their members? We had the unsavoury vision of male members searching for internet lolitas in their one-eyed way, and were intrigued by Jollyblogger’s:

The Purpose Driven Sex Life, Part 1

Perhaps Part 2 is “The Orgasm Driven Sex Life” and Part 3 “The Chauffeur Driven Sex Life” starring Hugh Grant.

There was the raunchy (and somehow appropriate for Pastor Ted):

In and Out of the Corporate Closet – Whitepapers – Publications …”Why do I need to know about someone’s sex life?” …
Between one and ten percent of the … Among Evangelical Christians, 60% are in favor while 34% are not. …

and the grossly suggestive:

Fuller Online 2005-2006 Catalogue

And then there was this:

Christian Sex Toys
Discreetly to Your Door-Private
Porn Free-Lingerie-Toys-online shop
mybelovedsgarden.net (in full bloom)

So we had to look.

The homepage promises to provide

“a safe, non-pornographic place to shop, For all your Christian Sex toys and Romance needs, While keeping Christ at the center of your marriage.”

We have to report that we found the assorted Vibrating Bullets, Massage Vibes, Glass Phalluses, G-Spot Vibes, Erection Control and Enhancement devices, Hands Free Clitoral Stimulators and Anal Stimulators very christian and inoffensively plain-brown-wrapperly, although, while they are promoted as specifically christian sex toys, we did not notice a crucifix engraved or embossed on, or attached to any of the vibrators or other devices.

The lingerie was hot and swinging but the photos – of what we assume are the choir girls from the local temple – had been sensitively retouched so as not to arouse.

 

But there was just one problem. We looked and looked and, for the longest time, could not work out what was upsetting us about the pictures until we saw – or rather didn’t see – it.

None of the models has a belly-button! Is this for biblical eve-ish accuracy? we wondered. or are evangelicals more aroused by the navel than the unsaved?

And then we noticed that one of the girls appeared to have soiled herself. That’s when we understood that for evangelicals, the biggest turn-on is indeed the navel and the biggest turn-off is a pooey bottom.

Safe from pornographic lust as promised!

Ah, we’ve come a long way from Augustine and John Calvin!

Thank you, Pastor Ted!