Tax Cuts or Money or Something
New in The Onion:
WASHINGTON—Some sort of tax cut or earnings or money or something was reported in economic news this week in further evidence that a lot of financial- related things have been going on lately.
According to numerous articles and economics segments from major media outlets, experts on banks and such have become increasingly concerned over a new extension or rates or a proposal or compromise that could signal fewer investments, and dollars, and so on.
Citing a desire to gain influence in Washington, the American people confirmed Friday that they have hired high-powered D.C. lobbyist Jack Weldon of the firm Patton Boggs to help advance their agenda in Congress.
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The 310-million-member group said it will rely on Weldon’s considerable clout to ensure its concerns are taken into account when Congress addresses issues such as education, immigration, national security, health care, transportation, the economy, affordable college tuition, infrastructure, jobs, equal rights, taxes, Social Security, the environment, housing, the national debt, agriculture, energy, alternative energy, nutrition, imports, exports, foreign relations, the arts, and crime.
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“The goal is to make it seem politically advantageous for legislators to keep the American people in mind when making laws,” Weldon said. “Lawmakers are going to ask me, ‘Why should I care about the American people? What’s in it for me?’ And it will be up to me and my team to find some reason why they should consider putting poverty and medical care for children on the legislative docket.”
Might even work in Australia. What do you think?
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Posted: 22 October, 2010 in Australian Values, comedy/humour, Economics, Education, environment, Life, Media, Medicine, politics and government, US Politics, values.
Tags: agriculture, alternative energy, comedy, consultant, crime, economic values, Economics, energy, environment, exports, foreign relations, housing, humor, humour, imports, lobbyist, Medicine, money, nutrition, Onion, Onion News, Onion News Network, political values, politics, poverty, tax, tax cuts, the arts, the national debt, The Onion, values